Tripp doesn’t talk much during sex, which is ironic because he talks a lot otherwise. He’s very extroverted and talks to everyone. He talks to strangers at the store or a restaurant (back when we could go to such places). He talks so much I have learned to listen (sort of) while doing other things. I generally hear the important bits. He walks in while I’m working or reading and just starts talking so I have to listen with one ear. He can strike up a conversation anywhere, at anytime, with anyone, except during sex. I really, really get off on dirty talk during sex. I want to be talked to. I want to be told what’s going to happen to me, I want to be told if I’m pleasing someone, I want to be told I’m a good boy, a pig, or a whore. I like verbal humiliation during sex. Call me a fucking faggot and watch my dick get hard.
Tripp knows that. He knows it because I talk during sex and because he has made me come just by talking to me during a scene. I get very graphic when I’m turned on. It’s the only time I don’t have a problem talking. But he doesn’t talk much and I don’t know how to change that or if I should. I’ve told him how much I like it, but he just stays quiet. I think that’s just where he goes. I think he gets inhibited or maybe that’s just where his mind goes. Sex is pretty much the only time I’m not inhibited.
When he was my bottom, he talked a bit more, particularly when I was fucking him. In fact, as I think about it, he only talked when I fucked him. I think that maybe he still has trouble seeing me as his sub. I worry he’s not entirely comfortable, and I don’t know how to make him feel better about his skill as a Dom. I want him to enjoy sex as much as I do and I want to know that he does. I feel like I would know he was into it if he were more verbal. He says he is when we talk at other times, but I still worry. He’s just hard to read sometimes.
All I can think to do is to continue to encourage him, to keep telling him how much I love and appreciate him, and how turned on I am by him. Maybe this is just the way he is and will always be and I’ll just learn to accept it. I just don’t know.