I wanted you before I knew what you were.
Then one day, I saw you, a primitive you, on the internet
Ungainly, uncomfortable, complicated you appeared on my screen
You had different names; cb, seedpod, keeper. You had different appearances, but they were all you.
I was mad with desire for you, and afraid of that desire. The early you disappointed me. You did not live up to my image of you.
You must have known that, because you reinvented yourself. You multiplied. You changed form and shape. You changed what you were made of, but the essence of you stayed the same. My desire for you never decreased.
You caused me pain and injury, yet still I wanted you. You were hard to live with and harder to live without.
Iteration after iteration of you teased me, until finally you became what you had always promised. For all the changes you went through, you changed me more. I live in you now. You are my home.